Packing Memories, Not Gifts: A Holiday Redefined. Setting the Stage

Some paths in life lead to unforgettable moments, while others make you pause and wonder if you took a wrong turn. This blog will explore both kinds of paths some that uplift us and others that were a wrong turn. Together, we’ll discover new places, face challenges, and experience moments of clarity. My initial plan? To share a year in my life, in all its mess, beauty, and chaos. I invite you to join me ask questions, offer insights, and let’s dive into this adventure of self-exploration.

These first two entries complement and contradict each other. They take place a year apart and are both about Christmas, past and present. The story begins with a holiday decision that led me to throw a lifetime of traditions out the window and seek the beauty of the season in another country. In 2024, I packed up my family and flew overseas, away from the usual hustle and bustle, to immerse ourselves in the magic of Christmas markets and the glow of Scandinavian lights. But before we talk about this 2024’s holiday, let’s rewind to last year to understand how I got here.

Last Christmas, I found myself trying to create the "perfect" holiday for my entire family six of us, plus two dogs, my brother (who lives far away), my sister, her kids, and my mom. Although I’m the youngest, I’ve always felt responsible for everyone else’s happiness. It’s both a blessing and a curse, and either way, it stresses me out. So, my brother always makes the journey east to spend Christmas with us. And this year, I wanted to show him just how much I appreciate that. I decided to make his season unforgettable. I thought, This year, I’ll nail it.

Hot cocoa with peppermint schnapps, a cozy dinner for us to catch up, carols, cookie-making it would be special. I went all in. My home has historically been the meeting place, so this meant multiple meals to prepare, balancing ski trips, games, communal table time, and decorating. If you looked at the photos, I nailed it everything was perfect. But pictures only tell the story you want them to tell. They’re superficial. It’s only when you peer into the corners and look beyond the smiles that you get a true reflection of an event.

Don’t get me wrong, I love being the holiday host. I thrive on bringing people together, on the joy of family meals and laughter around the tree. But there’s a tipping point, a line I can’t always see until it’s too late. After all the holiday cheer the work, the planning, the endless to-do lists I was exhausted. I felt stretched thin, like I’d given all my energy and was running on fumes. It wasn’t the holiday magic I remembered from my childhood, or the kind I was hoping for. Maybe this was what Christmas is now? A holiday for burnt-out adults too stressed to sit down and enjoy the fruits of their labor?

And then came New Year’s. My birthday, no less. Turning 50 is a milestone, but how do you celebrate it when you're a private person who doesn't want the attention? We’ve always had a New Year’s Eve party, with friends gathering for a night of celebration. They know it’s my birthday, but the focus has always been on the new year. When the decorations shifted and the spotlight suddenly turned on me, I felt... uncomfortable. Could everyone see the exhaustion in my eyes? Was I being short with my guests? I loved seeing my friends and family, but the shift in focus only further depleted my energy reserves.

That’s when I realized something had to change. The holiday grind, the expectations, the juggling of family obligations if I didn’t do something different, I’d lose my love for this time of year. That’s when the dream of a stress-free holiday was born. No more obligations. No more running myself ragged. Instead, I would create a perfect Christmas, one without stress and without feeling responsible for everyone else’s cheer. For the first time in years, I felt the pull to step away and find peace in simplicity.

Christmas 2024 would be different. It would be about creating memories, not checking off lists. So, I did something radical: I booked a trip to Scandinavia to experience European Christmas markets, Icelandic landscapes, and a holiday without the pressure of tradition. This would be less stress, less work, and, I hoped, more joy. It felt like the perfect antidote to the burnout I was feeling.

In writing this, it seems obvious: you can’t just cross the world and solve your underlying tendencies and issues. But maybe it’s the beginning of a journey, a series of realizations that guide you toward a more fulfilling holiday season. I can be impulsive, so I booked the trip and we were going. And damn it, we were going to have a great time.